Aspire Therapy

Are You In Control Of Your Thoughts?

Are you in control of your thoughts or do you allow your thoughts to control you? We like to think of ourselves as autonomous, independent, self-sufficient beings and yet all to often we play the victim when it comes to our own state of mind.

This is particularly the case when we are suffering from loss of confidence, low self-esteem, depression or lack of self-belief. The thoughts we have about ourselves can seem unalterable and inescapable.

But negative, self-critical thinking can be challenged or diminished through a process of careful self-questioning, or by letting the thoughts become objects of detached contemplation. These are two approaches that we use in hypnotherapy.

Seeing the World Through Another Person’s Eyes

What might it be like to see the world through another person’s eyes? Sounds like the stuff of science fiction, but it’s so easy to become locked in our own way of seeing that perhaps we should pose this question to ourselves more often.

Inevitably we see the world from our own point of view – and ultimately cannot do otherwise. But sometimes it is worth taking an imaginative leap and thinking about the other perspectives.

After all, as we often point out, the imagination is a very powerful resource. Through films and television fiction we allow ourselves to enter into other people’s lives, seeing the world through the eyes of our hero or heroine and losing ourselves in the process. Perhaps we should apply this skill more often in our everyday lives.

Rise and Shine!

How do you start your day? Think back to this morning. What were your very first thoughts? What did you tell yourself as you heard the alarm go off?

Psychologists have found that the way we start our daily routine can actually have an amazing impact on how we experience the remainder of our day.

In fact, that very first hour we awake has been likened to the rudder of a ship, which serves to steer a course for the rest of our day, according to Dr Robert Holden (see our earlier article).

So where is your ship headed?

How Happy Are You?

Did you know that you can train yourself to be a happier person and that it is possible to actually re-wire your brain to think happy thoughts naturally and automatically?

So says Dr Robert Holden who first came to the public’s attention in 1996 when he featured in the now famous BBC QED programme ‘How to be happy’.

According to Dr Holden, (also known as ‘the happiness psychologist’), we are responsible for the level of happiness and fulfilment that we enjoy on a day to day basis.

A Room With A View

We live out much of our lives in what could be regarded as trance states, caught up in our own world and in our own way of thinking.

This notion may seem puzzling at first, but if being in hypnosis is simply this kind of absorbed attention, then it can be seen as a frame of mind which dominates our experience of life.

In our article When is a Trance Not a Trance we have talked about trance states being part of our everyday life, but to say we spend large periods of our lives in trance states takes this idea a step further.

The fact we inhabit such states is inevitable and not necessarily something that should worry us. But it can mean that we become closed off to alternative possibilities and to different ways of viewing our lives and our problems.

A Change of Perspective

A brisk walk can be one of the best ways of relieving the mind of stress, anxiety or depression. As you walk try not to allow your mind to get caught up in that incessant weave of inner thoughts. It’s precisely those thoughts which are probably causing you to feel the way you do.

Open yourself up to your surroundings. Actually see, here and feel where you are. Breath in the fresh air if you’re in the countryside or by the sea - see the sights, hear the sounds, feel the feelings…

So often, even when we’re out walking, we shut ourselves off from the world around us. Only by becoming aware of the fact we’re doing this can we break the habit.

Become a Time Traveller

Our understanding of time has an important bearing upon our feelings of mental and emotional well-being.

Clinical Psychologist, Michael D Yapko, well known for his work on the application of hypnosis in therapy, believes that the person who is in good mental and emotional health thinks flexibly about time.

These people are able to move freely between the past, the present and the future. This means that in dealing with everyday living they can draw equally well upon past experiences, future possibilities and perceptions of the present.

Some individuals however get locked into one way of experiencing time and this can be associated with particular forms of behaviour.

On Not Seeing the Wood for the Trees

How frequently do you find yourself looking for something and not being able to find it – the car keys, a purse, an item of clothing, or a mobile phone?

This is an experience which happens to even the most organised of us, usually when we are panicking about getting somewhere quickly.

But isn’t it often also the case that having searched high and low for that elusive item you then find it in exactly the place where you would have expected to find it - the place, in fact, where you started your search. For some reason you just didn’t see it the first time around.

Loops of Thought

The ability to think self-consciously is the key thing that distinguishes humans from animals. To be able to reflect upon ourselves and the world we live in is a miraculous gift and one that may be unique in the universe.

And yet thoughts are also the things that can torment us most, particularly when we are tired, anxious, stressed, worried or depressed.

One of the most common things that clients suffering from stress complain about are thoughts which go round and round in their heads, tormenting and exhausting them.

Stop and Take a Deep Breath…

It’s incredible how much of our lives we spend looking forward to the future and hoping that the present moment will pass as quickly as possible. ‘…I just want to get to the end of the day so I can relax…I'll be able to unwind at the weekend…the holidays will be here soon...’

There’s nothing wrong with having things to look forward to in our lives, but the extent to which our perceptions of the future can take over from our lives in the present, sometimes reaches unhealthy proportions.

Often the reason why we are struggling to get through the present moment is because we are feeling stressed. One of the main reasons for our feeling of stress, however, is that our minds are overloaded.

And what do we overload our minds with? We overload our minds with thoughts - thoughts of what has happened in the recent past and of what might happen in the future. Under these conditions we function less effectively.