Are You In Control Of Your Thoughts?

Are you in control of your thoughts or do you allow your thoughts to control you? We like to think of ourselves as autonomous, independent, self-sufficient beings and yet all to often we play the victim when it comes to our own state of mind.

This is particularly the case when we are suffering from loss of confidence, low self-esteem, depression or lack of self-belief. The thoughts we have about ourselves can seem unalterable and inescapable.

But negative, self-critical thinking can be challenged or diminished through a process of careful self-questioning, or by letting the thoughts become objects of detached contemplation. These are two approaches that we use in hypnotherapy.

Rather than thinking something such as ‘I have this thought because that is the way things are’, it can be better to ask yourself, ‘what is the point of having this thought; where does this thinking get me?’

This won’t necessarily stop the thought, but it will introduce a new and more dynamic perspective from which to view your thinking. As oppose to limiting you to how you have been in the past, or how you seem to be in the present, this perspective raises the question of how you want to be in the future.

It gets us to consider our thinking in terms of its usefulness and at the same time contains the suggestion that certain ways of thinking may not be necessary or inevitable.

Enmeshed

The trouble is that when we get caught up in a negative train of thought, those thoughts get enmeshed with our feelings and therefore gather energy. By gathering energy they become more powerful and controlling.

Rather than getting caught up in that train of thought, try taking a step back from it. Watch it for a while. What does that thought look like, what does it sound like? What does it feel like?  Imagine it as a leaf in a stream or a bird crossing the sky and watch it drift off. See how good that feels.

Rational Questioning

If this sounds too fanciful for your taste then bring some rational questioning to bear upon that negative thinking.

Ask yourself what’s the evidence for thinking that way - are you exaggerating, generalising, or seeing things too personally? ‘Am I sure everyone dislikes me? Everyone? Really? That’s a lot of dislike from a lot of people? Does so-and-so dislike me?’ Bring it down to particulars. Weigh up the evidence.

Catch negative trains of thought quickly before they spiral out of control and either let go of them in some way which works for you, or question and challenge their validity.

Comments

[Mind Body Shop]

Words of comfort, skillfully administered, are the oldest therapy known to man.