Confidence Building for Women

I have just finished teaching a six-week confidence-building course at Chorley Women’s Centre, Lancashire, on Saturday mornings. The course is designed to empower the women by giving them a range of confidence building strategies, which they can then apply to their own situations.

Some of the women who attend my groups have been severely affected by low self esteem for years, often due to appalling treatment at the hands of others – and yet these women survive, and not only survive, but prosper. It always amazes me how resilient these women are and how responsive they are to positive change – once they know how to get it.

At the start of the course I ask each woman to give herself a mark out of ten on ‘The Confidence Scale’. I then ask everyone where they want to be by the end of the course, and most importantly, how will they know when they are more confident – what will they be doing and how will their life be different when their confidence increases? It is essential that I encourage each woman to see confidence in very specific terms – what does it mean for her?

Fearful of Change

At this early stage, most of the women are fearful of change and find it difficult to imagine being more confident or assertive. But within a very short amount of time, everything begins to shift, and it never ceases to amaze me how rapid the change can be.

Each week, as the women arrive, I immediately notice the changes – small at first. Someone has a new hair-do or has had their nails done, someone has had a massage, another has started to wear make-up.

In the third and fourth weeks, more dramatic changes occur – someone has driven on the motorway for the first time in years, another is introducing changes in the way she disciplines her kids, another has signed up for a college course - and the changes go on.

Truely Astounding Stories

Towards the end of the course, the women are asked to capture all the changes they have made to their lives in just over a month and it is truly astounding to hear their stories.

These women have moved on, they have taken control and are beginning to see themselves as confident individuals who can achieve their goals. They also realise that confidence is a journey – they will go on developing once they leave the course and forever more.

It is always a pleasure to teach these courses. The women inspire and motivate me and provide absolute proof that change is possible, even in the most impossible situations.

MG